Pushing people into limos and other Vegas career options

I know I've been posting a lot about jobs, careers, and career-hunting lately, but I haven't had time to think about much else. I've applied to some jobs lately that I truly hoped I would get. And then there's everything else.

At least job hunting in Las Vegas is entertaining. There was the posting for "Steel Erection Manager," which is giggle-worthy just from the title. This is pretty much what I'd call level-one job search humor: The simple idea of the job is funny.

Level-two humor occurs when the salary or, more often, wage, is laughable. I can't tell you how many times I've been really excited about a certain job until I get down to the bottom and see how much they're offering to pay me. "Seeking ghostwriter to turn my life story into a manuscript. $9 per hour." Come on people. I'm a professional.

Level-three humor is, I think, mostly unique to Vegas, though I'm sure lots of locales have their own version of it. Level-three humor occurs in the job description, maybe in some of the listed duties or directions for the hiring process. "Woman needed to shove tourists into cabs to be driven to VIP locale," is a hilarious way of saying that you'll have to target drunk twenty-somethings who look like they're apt to lose track of direction while someone drives them in circles on the way to an unmarked brothel. "Looking for an experienced executive assistant who types at least 70 wpm and has knowledge of Excel. Must be willing to interview in a bathing suit," is another way an employer says he doesn't care if you know how to answer the phone; he was short in high school. Now he's a freelance accountant, dammit.

At least, in the dismal process of job hunting, I get a few laugh breaks. Even though I'm not going to submit a paralegal application that requires headshots.